Revision 1 rebuilds the Egg Retrieval Control around your direction: brighter grounds with branded elements, illustration leading and photography supporting, your own office b-roll instead of stock — and a simpler, lower-anxiety read. Every note you sent is answered below, with live motion and illustration samples you can play right here.
The Revision-1 light system: USF brand colors used as ink, accent and linework over warm-white grounds and pale act tints. Cranberry is the primary; Gold appears exactly once (the Scene 8 reveal).
Seven directional notes and eight scene notes. Here's the overall direction; the scene-by-scene resolutions are further down with live mockups.
The whole frame system flips. v1 built every scene on deep Navy. Revision 1 builds on warm white and pale tints, with the USF brand colors used as ink, accents and linework. Headlines stay deep Navy, so it reads bright and airy — never washed-out. Same scene, both treatments:
You asked to see transitions/motion, how we illustrate the procedure (1:00–1:22), and how graphics sit over your footage. I'm building all three in After Effects right now — here are reference frames for each so you can see the intended look while the motion demo is finished.
Calm and premium — cross-dissolves between scenes, elements that draw on, chips that float up, soft act-to-act wipes. Nothing bounces or spins; everything resolves to stillness.
The hero scene as a calm editorial schematic — follicles, an ultrasound-guided fine needle, gentle suction into the collection tube. Accurate and reassuring, never graphic or anatomical.
Please share the office b-roll mentioned — so no clip ever feels like stock.
Live light-system mockups (graphics rendered in-browser; photographed scenes show framed b-roll stand-ins until your footage arrives). Each scene flags exactly what changed from v1.
The library you mentioned — procedure rooms, lab, reception. We'll light-grade + frame it into Scenes 4, 5, 6 (and optionally 11–13).
Your "office" note landed on the timing scene; we applied it to both. Tell us which you meant.
On the clinical stats still in VO (Scenes 6–10) — accuracy retained, just no longer the loud visual.